Ever feel like your work is taking over your life??
I like my job, some of the people I get to meet are really nice, I enjoy the buzz I get when a sale exchanges contracts and someone comes into the office to collect keys to their new home. Not just because it means that I get paid for it but also because I get to see the excitement they feel about the new chapter they are just about to begin and its cool knowing that somewhere along the line I was a part of that and I helped that happen.
But over the last few weeks the enjoyment is slipping. Most nights I'm lucky if I get out of the office before about 7 o'clock even though they stop paying me at 6. Most Saturdays I don't get time for a lunch break and end up going home feeling ill where I haven't eaten all day. By the time I get home I'm too tired to do anything. I don't see enough of my friends because most evenings all I'm fit for is home, dinner and sleep (I am in bed virtually every night by 10pm, how sad is that?!) and its starting to get me down.
This Saturday I had the afternoon off. The plan was simple, I would finish work at 1pm, jump in the car and pootle over to Ali and by 1.30 we would be in Wanstead catching up, putting the world to rights and picking specs for her wonky eyes. Did it happen? Well eventually yes but not without a hitch. Work was mega short-staffed and I ended up being alone in the office for ages until someone eventually turned up to take over from me over an hour later than I was meant to leave. Sounds ridiculous now but I was so angry and frustrated by the time I left that I burst into tears as soon as I sat in the car!!
It just feels like I am slogging my guts out for nothing. No-one else seems to give a shit about what they do. They have their lunch even if we're rushed off our feet, they walk out the door dead on 6pm, they get to leave when they're meant to. Feels like I'm always the sucker that does that bit extra and it gets me nowhere.
Damn I sound like a whinge bag tonight, and its not like I'm even feeling sorry for myself particularly. Just frustrated I guess and not really sure what the answer is.
Maybe things will improve. Maybe its time to start looking for a new job.
All I know at the moment is that I want a bit of my life back!!