If my phone rings once more I think I am going to have a nervous breakdown! Why do people not grasp the concept of 'I am busy and if you stop calling to see how I'm getting on I might actually have time to get on with something'??!!
My first entry and a mare of a day. It started off pretty well. For once I got up on time, decided what I was going to wear and didn't change my mind 8 times cos I felt like a heffer, the Central Line was running OK (shock horror)AND I got a seat without having to have a fight in the process (DOUBLE SHOCK HORROR!). I arrived at work on time which is a novelty in itself and I felt pretty organised.
God knows what happened but now I am in complete chaos and am surrounded by bits of paper that make no sense! All I want to do is go home, put my PJ's on and sit and watch crap TV whilst feeding my newly acquired addiction to Peanut M&M's- great for the waistline (I don't think!)
Trouble is when I start getting pissed off at work I start stressing about everything else. I don't know why, I should be pretty happy. I live in a nice flat (apart from the yucky pink bathroom)with my best friend, and in the year and a half that we have lived together we have never fallen out (well apart from the time I told her I hated her but I blame that on the vodka!). I have a good job and have just been promoted so I am actually making a career out of it and do normally enjoy it, but I feel so unsettled at the moment.
I was watching my friends wedding video the other day. Sad I know but she lives in Australia now and I haven't seen her since last year. Anyway I was watching the video and I really miss her a lot and I keep thinking about packing everything up and moving out there or going travelling or something. She is pregnant at the moment and its really weird to think that she is having cravings and getting fat and although she e-mails me and tells me what's going on its not the same.
I don't know what it is but I can't help feeling like I'm missing out on something. 3 months ago I was pretty happy with my life. I was seeing a really nice guy and work was OK and I was having a good time with my mates. Perhaps its just cos there's so many things been happening. I broke up with the guy I was seeing, my oldest friend is getting married in August and everybody else seems to be having babies. Don't get me wrong I don't want to go down the crappy nappies and vomit route (not yet anyway- I'm only 24!) but at least they have someone else there. No offence Cosmic (my flatmate) but at the end of the day I go home to an inflatable alien called Bert and an inflatable kangaroo called Ernie. There's something not very satisfactory about sitting in on your own (apart from Bert & Ernie of course) on a Saturday night watching 'I Love 1989' and drinking red wine and eating cookie dough ice-cream on your own!
Bloody hell- that was all a bit depressing for my first entry but I feel better for having had a moan and at least the sodding phone has stopped! Anyway I s'pose I should get back to it. Only an hour and a half to go and then I can go to the pub for a drink or two!
Oh my god- something fantastic has happened- a cream egg has just been bought for me. As my flatmate would say 'Happy Days'........